Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Ray aka Slakivich's LiveJournal:

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Tuesday, October 18th, 2005
6:35 pm	im sorry (last update maby) yeah i havent used this in a long time, it lost all importance. lots have happened and i just wanna say sorry to everyone it affects. sharon sorry i kept blowing u off all summer. it was wrong of me to not talk to u, and be that way. steve tried to help, and i lied saying id fix things. nick sorry i joke about u and tom, and your car. i know ure not exactly happy where u are in life, and i shouldndt make it harder for u by teasing u like this. thank god ure going back to your red sho. gina sorry for not being in school the day that report was made. im barely taking this class serious, and i hope my lack of participation dosnt screw up your grade. and im sorry we lost touch over the years. i miss the times we could chat for long w/ no fights. sarah c sorry i seem like such a dissapointment to you. i must seem like a giant hypocrite, and for the most part im not. just for some strange reason whenever i tlak to you about something serious, i go and do the wrong thing. i said i was a respectful guy, and i blew that (still haunts me). i said u shouldnt drink, and i get hammerd and drive around at 3am. maby things coulda been diff for us. melissa im sorry for being me basicly. im sorry for saying what i did to you, i dont mean it. it was wrong of me to get so upset over the race. im sorry for not always being there, or vic versa. im sorry for causing you any trouble, or discomfort. i dont mean it. ive always wanted the best for u. and im sorry for whatever else i might have done to anyone. hopefully i cna control my life now and mature past high school soon. i dont like the drama, i wanna live on my own and get away form it. but im still here for anyone who needs help, i always will be :) ~ray (7 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, August 7th, 2005
9:03 pm	shitty weekend well last week i worked the whole time. didnt do much until wed night when me, tom, irina, and nick went to the gocarts on RT1. realy fun, well deff do that again. thursday i went to the carshow w/ rob cause melissa ditched me(fuck you). but it was a great show. ford f350 w/ a 15" lift and 44" tall tires! huge. from the drivers seat, u could see into second story windows. their was also a fox body mustang w/ centrivical s/c. he was puttin 510hp to the wheels and 490 tq. looks good too. well as he left, he shifted to second and hammered it. got the front wheels off the group and left a 50ft slab on the road as he round the corner. so thurs wansnt a complete let down. friday is when things shit the bed. irina and i were gonna see some local bands. we left around 5:30 and a huge thunderstorm came in just as we got on the road. the storm was awsome! but we got lost in walepole/norwood. so we went to dans house for directions, and finaly figured out where to go. so how were an hour and a half late, and the show SUCKED. noone was moshing, and their were cops there. so we left and hoped onto rt1 to find somethin else to do. well some guy was pointing at my truck, so i pulled over and find out my right rear tire is loosing air fast. so we turned around and parked in the movie theatres parking lot. there i got all the lugs off, but the rim was stuck to the axel, so i called AAA and they took care of it. by now it was like 9:30 so we said "fuck it, lts just get some food." went to applebees and out waitress was a bitch. but food was food. after dinner we hung at my house for a bit. sat i didnt do much. i wasnt feeling to good so i just stayed it. my truck is gettin 2 new back tires(i think u can do the math as to why) and that happens on monday. i dont think i didnt anything much sat, but it was ok. sunday was pretty bad. was going normal till my rents inform me our cat was making noises in the basment. well clancey was on his side, and literaly dying before our eyes. dont know realy what happened, but it realy hurt my dad. that cat was his best bud, and tomarrow is my dads bday (yeah happy bday, your cat is dead). so now i have to cancel my training at gillette toarrow, so we can take my dad out to cheer him up. so that was my great weekend. ditched thurs, crappy fri, sick sat, and death on sunday. TO IRINA: i need to know soon if u can go to locobazooka sept 18. TO SASSA: sarah, i need to know if u can go to the nascar race sept 18. or would u wanna go to locobazooka? either one is fine by me, but i need to buy tix soon. i wanna see the race, and the concert. if irina can go to the concert im goin to that since its close to her bday. if she cant, then ill deff wanna go see the race theres the update ~ray Current Mood: *sigh* (Comment on this)
Sunday, July 31st, 2005
1:13 am	well as for my last post, it stays the same. im still pretty mad at a few people, wather they know it or not. i dn y im so mad though... its realy over stupid lil things. but sometimes lil cuts and scrapes can kill a person, so lil things added together can make an impact. i was gonna join melissa,jen,sue,steve, and i guess mark was there too, and go bowling. irina imed me right before i left(thank god) so i picked her up to come too. maby 5-10min befor ariving at bowling, my stomache hurt so bad, i thought i was gonna hurl.i still walked in, but it wasnt getting better so i just left. no0one realy noticed though. jen gave a smile, and everyone else didnt say a thing to me. yeah thanks. so after we left, irina and i meet rob at hollister, then saw stealth. movie was better than i thought. nothing realy out of the ordinary happened(well for us that is), but hangin w/ irina realy helped. i was able to vent to her, and she helped. havent heard from her in a while, so it was nice to catch up. all in all: wat was gonna be a shitty night (bowling while sick), turned into a pretty good one. ~ray Current Mood: tired (Comment on this)
Friday, July 29th, 2005
11:51 pm	this is kinda a warning for this weekend and next week. im sick and tired of being the fucking last resort for all of u. u treat me as if ill go anywhere at anytime. i know im a last resort, cause yall allways have other plans that fall through, then magicly i get a fuckin fone call. fuck that. i hate bein treated that way. and when I try to plan something, everybody seems to be busy, and they go do the thing i tried planning w/ someone else. i dont know what the fuck happened over the past few weeks, but for the most part i dont like it. somehow it seems ok to rag on ray, to insult him jokingly, well i sick of it. stop treating me like this, cause its bringine me down slowly (and planty of u know how depressed i can get). so cut the shit PLEASE. this isnt about 1 evet, its about almost everything thats happened w/ everyone fore the past couple of weeks. i guess im writing here to explain y i might be in a bad mood in the enxt few days... or maby so some of u will be a lil nicer. im sick of writing about this shit ~ray Current Mood: pissed/sad (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, July 25th, 2005
10:10 am	interesting weekend well im bored at work so ill update a lil bit. not to mention being tired, and my arm/sholder is killing me, but ill get to that in a sec. well last week all i did was work. since my companions were away ion their seperate vacations, i didnt have much to do. fridaty, after almost dieing (read the post below this one) i got a haircut and sat inside basicly. i then played the middle-man between melissa and jen about their concert on sat... shoulda just gave the fone to jen, cause that was pointless. i left the house expecting to go to robs, but he wasnt home so i was just gonna go home. thats when amanda called me and invited me to hang out w/ her and sarah. so we sat outside in the trucks bed, went inside and had some vodka/rum/whisky (the hell if i rember wat it was). thast when the lightning started, so we went out in the truck to watch the storm. after 20min the rain became evtremey heavy, while we were on 495. i had to pull over to the side because i was constantly hydroplaining. when we got back, i just fell on the couch and didnt move for a good 2 hours. at about 1am, amanda convinced me to just spend the night there w/ them. didnt fall asleep till about 3 am, and got up at 8:30... needless to say i was tired after that. sat, i sat on my ass playing videogames. i was to tired to do anything at all. i stayed at the house all day (i looked like shit) then around 9:30 at night all kept pestering me to go out w/ her, so we went to wendys and got some food. kinda interesting to hear about her lil sister... anyways, bout an hour later i was back at home and went to bed. did i mention i was tired. sunday i coulda gone to the beah w/ kev and them all, but i had to dig a fucking hole in the abck yard. took me about 3 hours in the blazing hot sun, and i ahd to move this rock that weight almost as much as i do. but as a good note, the pool will be ready realy soon. the dirt is almost all filled in around it now, so theyll finish the linuing in the pool, and tiles and crap, so soon well all ahve a party. at night on sunday, amanda draged me outta my house again, this time w/ mollee. we just drove aroiund, and later picked up sarah. drove, then drove some more... jees fuck this i aint drivin again. the truck has enough miles on it as it is. today i went to get the speekers fixed in the truck, but aftwer waiting there for an hour they said "its in aftermarket speeker we cant do anything" FUCK!! now i have to deal w/ this horrible sound! but this also means i get my custome system even sooner than i expected :-D. not sure wat im doing tonight, but i hope i can see sassa. havent seen her in like 2 weeks! way to long. but i gotta get through work first... until i pdate again, ~ray Current Mood: pretty good (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, July 22nd, 2005
3:23 pm	almost died today on my way home from work today i was almost part of a pretty bad crash. i was in the fast lane going about 80-85, same as everyone else. there was a honda accord/civi (i dn, it was a lil sedan) and a white working van in the middle lane goin prob 75-80. their was other traffic, but most was far ahead or far behind the 3 of us. one of the vans tires blows out on him, and sent the van shooting to the left. he cliped the back end of the accord and kept going into the center grassy area between the highways. the accord was hit hard enough to send it spinnig across the lanes to the right. the van crossed infront of me prob by 5-10 feet, and pieces of the accord were all over the road. (actuely picked a piece of it from my grill when i got home :shock: ) after thsi happened i pulled over as soon as i could to collect myself. i checked where everyone was, and the van was on its side in the grass, realy close to the oposite traffic (their was damage on the roof and corners, so i assume he rolled) the accord was half in the slow lane and half in the breakdown lane. traffic was going by in the middle lane only, and going maby 15mph too. pieces of the accord were scattered across the highway, most smaller pieces, but some were literaly half the rear bumper. it took me about 10min to calm myself enough to think straight, so then i called 911 and reported the crash. the guy on the other end said he got about 15 other calls about it, and told me to stay there and wait for a state trooper. when the trooper pulled behind me, we got out and dicussed what happend. he grabed a water from his car and gave it too me (much needed, i was sweatin bullits lol) by this time, their was already fire and rescue here and taking care of the mess, still 1 lane of traffic. another trooper pulled behind the other, and the 2 of them wrote down what i told them wat happened. after that the first one said i should head home (still ahd an hours drive ahead of me) and to call him if i had anything else to say. so yea, quite a trip home... (Comment on this)
Friday, July 15th, 2005
11:34 pm	fun night, week update well this week i worked 6am to 6pm every day... it sucks. but the money is good :-D. its not so bad, cause i talk to sarah every day during my lunch break. didnt get to see her AT ALL this week, which sucks, and shes on vacation for a week. speaking of vacas, tom and melissa r on vaca too!! god nothin to do this coming week. well tonight was my saving grace. i was at adam borgets college grad party... some 20+ yr old girl was looking me up, and even creepier my dad was the one to tell me. i nvr goit her name, but she was always staring at me. (she was realy good lookin too was the strange part lol) ok so after i left ally called me, and i picked her up. we had a realy good time too. laughing almost non stop about relationships, friends, lol body fluids. but we started seeing like military aircraft, and got REALY scared. thought we were gonna get bombed or somethin. well after that we went to the races tonight, which were awsome. i love goin to them cause people dont say it in fornt of me, but i get so much respect. i love it :-D. well thats update i guess. ~ray Current Mood: happy (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, July 13th, 2005
1:35 pm	blahh how is it dreams can consume us they can captivate our emotions to sway or they can protect us. i find in my dreams two cratures one an older coyote, wise and well known one a young wolf, energetic and spirited. the two never cross paths, until the path i travel. confronted, im worried for my safty yet im compelled to follow one. i have no place to run. i must choose which one will hurt less which one may let me go. but the 2 creatures have a fight of their own. they bark and snarl at eachother like 2 siblings. but their verbal attacks are nvr followed by a real attack. they are more interested in their prey. i have to choose which one will hurt less which one might let me go. suddenly the seasons change it is no longer the hot summers day the clouds close together and the white powder falls. the creatures are frighten and soon become covered w/ the snow. the snow grows hevier. the creatures beocme identical. i am now faced w/ a blind choice: i choose one that may hurt me less but will the other one let me go? before the other has a chance to punce or for me to see which i choose my body is lifted from my dreamworld. (6 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, July 10th, 2005
11:52 pm	real update well i promiced to update so here goes. im working now, and that bites. 6am to 6pm. this week will be my first whole week working. wed was my first day of work. its not to bad, just hate gettin up early. after work sarah, tom, lauren, and i went to funway. (i forget when, but gina came w/ us one time...) thursday i ahd off from work, cause of docs. after docs, me and sarah went to hollister. she helped pick out 2 shirts, which i must say are the best one i have lol. after that i stayed in, i was pretty tired... i think. friday i had work again, then i had dinner w/ the family, and went to tims house. then i drove around ntil later at night. sat, i dont remember to good during day. but at night me dan andy johny and terrence were at andys playin halo 2. it was great to see johnny again. to give u a sence of how long, last time he saw me, i was fat. lol. sat night i got home, and me and melissa had a loooong chat. it was deff needed, since we had alot hiding, and alot to say. but i wasnt exacly pleased w/ everything. sat night kind aleft a bad taste in my mouth for sunday, but i chilled w/ rob, ben, and sammie and that help cheered me up. so by 7pm i was good to go to see sarah(:-* <3). we hung out w/ a bunch of people, and saw white noise. o my way home i stoped by to say hi to amanda. she told me a few scary stories and stuff, so tomarrow were all gonna go to scary road, and i have a suprice hehehehe. im prob leaving a bunch out, but im to damn tired lol. welp im goin to bed. ~ray Current Mood: tirrred (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, July 8th, 2005
5:58 pm	YEEEE HAAAW well since ill be 18 soon enough, i better find wat side i lean tword. liberal or conservative. during the 04 elsection i felt keary shoulda won, yet i could not find much of a difference in either canidates policies. so i asumed i joined the rest of MASS and was liberal. Your Political Profile Overall: 70% Conservative, 30% Liberal Social Issues: 75% Conservative, 25% Liberal Personal Responsibility: 50% Conservative, 50% Liberal Fiscal Issues: 75% Conservative, 25% Liberal Ethics: 75% Conservative, 25% Liberal Defense and Crime: 75% Conservative, 25% Liberal How Liberal / Conservative Are You? GIMME A SHOTGUN, A CONFEDERATE FLAG, AND THE "DUKES OF HAZZARD" HORN!!! dont worry sarah, ill give a real update soon enough. i already asume well do soemthin this weekend, most likey w/ the group as usual, so ill update after. :-P ~ray as a odd note... im listining to techno again. *busts a move*...*tries to bust a move* Current Mood: upbeat, happy (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, July 2nd, 2005
10:10 pm	bored sat night well im bored, so i filled this out ABOUT YOU Your full name:: Ray Michael Charbonnier Age:: 17 (18 in augest) Height:: 5'10" Natural hair color:: brown Eye color:: brown/hazel Number of siblings:: 1 step-sis Glasses/contacts?:: got both, wear contacts Piercings:: none Tattoos:: in augest i will, none now Braces?:: none FAVORITE Color:: black i guess Band:: currently "the recieving end of sirens" Song:: "the following" by the northwood Stuffed animal:: the teddy bear my biological parents gave me Video game:: umm... havent played in months TV show:: any NASCAR race Movie:: boondock saints Book:: i don't read Food:: everything! Game on a cell phone:: tetris CD cover:: no clue Flower:: they make me sneeze Scent:: "i like the smell of your body" seriously, that ques is creepy Animal:: im a cat person Comic book:: JTHM Cereal:: Trix r for kids.... and ray Website:: ebaumsworld.com Cartoon:: FAMILY GUY!!!! DO YOU Play an instrument?:: used to DJ Watch TV more than 60 hours a week?:: i listin to the radio Like to sing?:: all the time Have a job?:: starting next week Have a cell phone?:: yep Like to play sports?:: yea, even though i suck Have a boyfriend/girlfriend?:: no Have a crush on someone?:: sassa i miss you! Live somewhere NOT in the United States?:: no Have more than 5 TV’s in your house?:: holy crap, yea Have any special talents/skills?:: not really Exercise daily?:: i try Like school?:: i actuely do CAN YOU Sing the alphabet backwards?:: no...lol Stand on your tip toes without wearing shoes?:: *crunch* OWWW!! nope guess not Speak any other languages?:: i know a lil spanish Go a day without food?:: i used to :-/ Stay up for more than 24 hours?:: u dam right i can Read music, not just tabs?:: nope Roll your tongue?:: yes Eat a whole pizza?:: probible HAVE YOU EVER Snuck out of the house?:: yes Cried to get out of trouble?:: yes Gotten lost in your city?:: no, but in norton i did Seen a shooting star?:: no Been to any other countries besides the united states?:: no Had a serious surgery?:: yes Stolen something important to someone else?:: no Solved a rubiks cube?:: no Gone out in public in your pajamas?:: yes Cried over a girl?:: yes, happens more than it prob should lol Cried over a boy?:: no Kissed a random stranger?:: no Hugged a random stranger?:: no Been in a fist fight?:: yes Been arrested?:: sorta, been brought to the station then let go Done drugs?:: yes pot, once thats it Had alcohol?:: yes Laughed and had milk come out of your nose?:: no Pushed all the buttons on an elevator?:: yes, its so fun :-D Gone to school only to find you had the day off because of a holiday/etc?:: no Swore at your parents?:: yes Been to warped tour?:: no Kicked a guy where it hurts?:: yes, he was winning the fight i had too Been in love?:: yes Been close to love?:: yes Been to a casino?:: no Ran over an animal and killed it?:: yes Broken a bone?:: yes my wrist Gotten stitches?:: yes a few Had a water balloon fight in winter?:: yea sounds like somethin id try Drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour?:: no Made homemade muffins?:: a long time ago, when my mom was still alive :( Bitten someone?:: derrek maccune! he was choaking me! Been to Disneyland Disneyworld?:: yes disney world More than 5 times?:: yes, i have family in florida Been to Niagara falls?:: no Burped in someone’s face?:: im a guy, we do that when were younger Gotten the chicken pox?:: i think so WHENS THE LAST TIME YOU Brushed your teeth:: woke up this mornin Went to the bathroom:: *zip* k, im back Saw a movie in theaters:: last saturday (land of the dead) Read a book:: umm... 5 years ago? Had a snow day:: IT IS SUMMER Had a party:: my 12th bday, yea a while ago Had a slumber party:: new years 2003 had a huge halo-fest Made fun of someone:: today Tripped in front of someone:: last day of school Went to the grocery store:: few days ago Got sick:: the other day Cursed:: fuck!!! PICK ONE Fruit/vegetables:: fruit Black/white:: black... no white.... no michael jackson!! Lights on/lights off:: lights off TV/movie:: movie Car/truck:: my rumble bee Body spray/lotion:: *blink blink* Cash/check:: cash Pillows/blankets:: blankets Headache/stomach ache:: headache Paint/charcoal:: wtf?! how are they related? Chinese food/Mexican food:: mexican Summer/winter:: summer Snow/rain:: snow Fog/misty:: fog Rock/rap:: rock Meat/vegetarian:: meat Chocolate/vanilla:: vanilla Sprinkles/icing:: mmmm sprinkles Cake/pie:: cake French toast/French fries:: french toast Strawberries/blueberries:: strawberries Ocean/swimming pool:: pool, im afraid of the ocean Hugs/kisses:: i like both, more hugs in the winter Cookies/muffins:: cookies Wallet/pocket:: pocket Window/door:: door... Emo/goth:: emo <-- thats me Pink/purple:: pink Cat/dog:: cat Long sleeve/short sleeve:: short sleeve Pants/shorts:: pants Winter break/spring break:: spring break Spring/autumn:: autumn Clouds/clear sky:: clear sky Moon/mars:: moon FRIENDSHIP How many friends do you have?:: enough to help me What are their names?:: everyone who reads this Do you have a best friend?:: yes a few Have you ever liked one of your friends?:: yes Do you have more guy friends or more girl friends?:: girl friends Have you ever lost a friend?:: no, thank god Have you ever gone to an amusement park with a friend? yes What’s an inside joke between you and a friend?:: if i said one, others would be mad Have you ever gotten in a big argument with a friend? yes What’s the nicest thing you’ve ever done for a friend?:: when i helped karen erlier this year What’s the nicest thing a friend has ever done for you?:: rob stuck w/ me after my mom died Do you miss any of your old friends?:: yes, lost touch w/ the guys from BSS What friend have you known the longest?:: rob, 17years Do you regret anything you’ve done to a friend?:: yes, ive done a few bad things How often do you spend time with your friends?:: a lot Do any of your friends drive?:: yes Has a friend of yours ever died?:: no, thank god What’s the dumbest thing you’ve done with a friend?:: all the fire stuff at my old house :-/ What do you think your friends think of you?:: i hope they think good of me LOVE AND ALL THAT CRAP Have you ever been in love?:: yes If you have, with who?:: past gf Are you single? yea... :-/ Are you in a relationship?:: no (miss u sassa) Do you believe there is someone for everyone?:: yes What is your idea of the best date?:: dinner, movie, hangout, races if she likes that haha What was your first kiss like?:: wierd/good How old were you when you got your first kiss?:: like 14 Do you think love is a load of shit? no What’s the best experience you’ve ever had with the opposite sex?:: dunno Have you ever been dumped?:: yes Have you ever dumped someone? yes What’s the most sexual thing you’ve done with the opposite sex?:: i wont tell :x I.... am:: Ray want:: happiness need:: support crave:: food? love:: ... hate:: trexler did:: bad things feel:: ^sorry for^ miss:: sassa (ok, sentimental ill put my mom here too) am annoyed by:: nick would rather:: be asleep? am tired of:: being sad will always:: be Ray What is your favorite genre of music?:: rock What time is it now?:: 10:30 p.m What day is it?:: july 2nd 2005 When’s the last time you called someone?:: over a week ago :-/ How much money do you have right now?:: nothing :( Are you hungry?:: not realy Whatcha doin? watchin NASCAR Do you like parades?:: umm... sure Do you like the moon?:: yes What are you going to do when you’re done with this?:: watch NASCAR i guess Isn’t cup a funny word when you repeat it over and over?:: ...... r u high? If you could have any magical power what would it be?:: control time Have you ever had a picnic?:: dont think so Did you ever have one of those skip-its when you were young?:: want me to sing the song for u :-P What about sock em boppers?:: "more fun than, a pillow fight. blow em up, put your hands in side. and then u can have, the time of your life!. sock em boppers" Are you wearing any socks right now?:: yes DO YOU THINK YOU ARE funny?:: yes pretty?:: no sarcastic?:: yes lazy?:: yes hyper?:: sometimes friendly? yes evil?:: no smart?:: yes strong?:: no talented?:: no dorky?:: maby ASSOCIATE THESE WORDS WITH SOMEONE YOU KNOW (or don’t know) high:: gina skip:: me n sassa dance:: melissa lonely:: me pen:: umm... flower:: karen window:: umm... psycho:: andy brain freeze:: dan orange:: the girl from the M&M commericals sassy:: my kitty!!!! jelly:: sherman FOR OR AGAINST suicide:: kinda both sides love:: for drunk drivers:: against airplanes:: for war:: againtist Canada:: for United States:: for rock music:: for gay marriage:: for school:: for surveys:: for parents:: for cars:: for...d killing:: against Britney spears:: against coffee:: for pants:: for WOULD YOU EVER Sky dive?:: yes Play strip poker?:: yes Run away?:: yes :( Curse at a teacher?:: already have Not take a shower for a week?:: fuck no! Ask someone out?:: yes Lie to someone to make them think better of you?:: no Visit a foreign country for more than a month?:: yes Go scuba diving?:: nooo Write a book?:: i dn, maby Become a rock star?:: yes Have casual sex?:: maby later in life: when im 43 and im going through a mid life crisis, and my secratary suzie comes onto me. lol LAST QUESTIONS What shampoo do you use?:: Head and Sholders When's the last time you did something sexual with the opposite sex?:: i wont tell :x What kind of computer do you have?:: Dell What grade are you in?:: 12th in september Do you like to throw popcorn at people in the movies?:: if they piss me off Or just make out?:: no, i payed $10 i want a plot How many posters do you have in your room?:: 1 How many CD’s do you have?:: more than 80 last time i checked What time is it now?:: 10:55 p.m. ~ray Current Mood: still kinda sad (7 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, June 19th, 2005
4:08 pm	just got a $300 speeding ticket 95 in a 65 :'( (7 Comments |Comment on this)
1:28 am	and a good sat too well today was a very long day!!! woke up at 8am and went right to work choping, sawing, stacking, and chipping wood. i worked from 8am-5pm! i smacked my head agenst the wood pile by accident and now ahve a nice gash on my forehead and its swolen. oww. well after i showered, i went to nicks and meet up w/ nick, delmar, and mark. we meet nicks dad who also has a rumble bee. then i picked up sassa, and we went to funway to ride the go-carts. at the track, lauren spun me out, right as i was about to pass sassa(who had the fastest cart 9) after the race, marc showed up, drunk as usual. we blew him off fast and got outta there. ot up to 120 on the higway comin home and got food and went to delmars. we hoped in the pool for a bit... at night. it was cold. so i gave sassa a ride home, and got a change of clothes on the way back to delmars. me delmar and nick sat in his basement and watched "the ali g show" until 1:30am. then i decided it was time to head home. well gotta get some sleep now, im soooo tired. i dn wats goin on for sunday, but i may just rest unless convinced otherwise ;) ~ray Current Mood: extremely tired (Comment on this)
Friday, June 17th, 2005
11:46 pm	another good friday well after school i meet irina at my place, and we went to look at bikes. prob end up gettin one in a month or so. stoped at 2 places, nothin cheap. so we went to see "batman begins" it was a pretty good movie. lots of action, and a decent plot, better than other batman movies. after the movies we went to delmars house to get together for dinner. we show up and hes not home, he went to pick up people. so his mom... lets me and irina into his house, and wait in his room... now were not goin out, but what mom lets a guy and a girl alone... in ure sons room... kinda weird. so he comes back, and we go to fitzeys (jesus... as i wrote this journal.... a tick was crawling up my leg.... thisis y i hate the summer) anyways, at dinner it was me irina, tom, his wife, foos, and sassa(bonus points for her cause she liked the rumble bee and go fast). dinner was awsome, very funny and good times. drove back to delmars w/ irina and sassa, droped off sasa, then went to my place to get irina back to her jeep. well thats when we got on the fone, and called many people. and ahd a big halo match. me, tom, foos, azzy, nick chm, dan, andy, tim, pj, and nick were there. after a good few hours of gaming, we all packed up and raced in the industrial park. i wasted nicks bmx w/ my dads 300c. well another fun friday night ahs come and gone. hopefuly tomarow night i can do somethin else, who knows. but i gotta be up at 8 to chop wood all day. ~ray Current Mood: good (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Friday, June 10th, 2005
11:53 pm	awsome night well tonight was sweet. irina and i went to the movies at 4, after getting food at BK and trying not to laugh at the register lady.get to the movies, and got yelled at by some lady cause we were tlaking, oops. whole movie we were dying laughing, me trying to point out all the possible sexual scenes in star wars. after movie we went to go scheck out bike helmets for her. and thats where we came to a conclution, and plan... i wont tell u bout that now. on our way we raced a red VW gulf on I95. we were cutting across all 3 lanes, even in the breakdown lane to keep control. needless to say, i won. so after that we went to west bridegwater to check out bikes, then i borught her home. btw, i DO like my dodge jacket on u. ;) after that i went to delmars house, where me, delmar, dan, foos, pj, and nick got together and went to fitzeys pub for some food. dinner was sweet, told them all about my gulf race, and we all just had a fun time. stoped at delamars to get his vid camera, then off to the industrial park for some races. first run agenst nick, i lost: i missed second gear and couldnt catch back up. second run, i let the auto do its job, and lost my half a car. third race, i manual shifted and whiped nicks SHO. soon as that was done we all booked it to my hosue, i had a feelin cops were on the way. chilled at my house for a while, diego and some fat girl showed up in 2 cars( 2 other people w/ them). waited for rob, then we all went to the industial park again. there we meet up w/ the mccues, and we all jsut got out and chilled. listined to rob and delmars subs, and me and mccues exhaust. i got a lil bored so did another huge burn out. this one was longer than the first, and its right next to it too. and this was on video now :-D. delmar, rob, and diego did their own shows too. i did a second burnout, and that was it for me heh. hung out for another 20min or so, and headed out. good start to a weekend, hope sat brings a good day too. rob and ben r takin me to the brockton races sunday night... those ones are HUGE over 50cars show up, compared to mansfiueld 8. ill update if somethin happens. ~ray Current Mood: not to bad (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, June 2nd, 2005
10:10 pm	deleted deleted have a nice fucking day (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Friday, May 27th, 2005
11:21 pm	fri night tonight was awsome! i loved every min of it. ull drive the truck someday. i cant stop smiling. thinking of u. i hope u relize wat i have tonight, i still care, and long for wat we had. i have tears of joy. not sure how u feel... how do u feel? i hope we can do this again. ~ray Current Mood: extremeely happy! hopeful (Comment on this)
Thursday, May 19th, 2005
10:03 pm	WtF MaTe!?!?! o.0 seems every week i find a new song. and they always seem to relay how i feel. well heres this weeks, staind "right here": I know I’ve been mistaken But just give me a break And see the changes that I’ve made I’ve got some imperfections But how can you collect them all And throw them in my face But you always find a way To keep me right here waiting You always find the words to say To keep me right here waiting If you chose to walk away I’d still be right here waiting Searching for the things to say To keep you right here waiting I hope you’re not intending To be so condescending It’s as much as I can take And you’re so independent You just refuse to bend So I keep bending till I break But you always find a way To keep me right here waiting You always find the words to say To keep me right here waiting If you chose to walk away I’d still be right here waiting Searching for the things to say To keep you right here waiting I’ve made a commitment I’m willing to bleed for you I needed fulfillment I found what I need in you Can’t you just forgive me I don’t want to relive all the mistakes I’ve made along the way But I always find a way To keep you right here waiting I always find the words to say To keep you right here waiting But you always find a way To keep me right here waiting We always find the words to say To keep me right here waiting If I chose to walk away Would you be right here waiting Searching for the things to say To keep me right here waiting _________________________________ and now as to y the tital says wtfmate. ive had alotta things on my mind for the past 2 weeks, and it sems everyday something else is added. my asthma seem to be more under control now, i guess im geting used to the season. but im still waiting on the new doc... my dad is talkign about this new pool. it seems sick, but it also seems expensive. he jokingly said the price was 95k! and i have a feelin its gonna be over 40k... hes a fucking idiot for doin that. i kno most of u are opposed to this, but i started using creatine on monday. its giving me the chance to work out longer, and is also making my body alot more tired. and as for being tired.... i couldnt sleep erlier this week. melissa started tlaking to me again on sunday, and things seemed so normal w/ us. i was up until 2 or 3am thinking(more like dreaming) of wat could happen. monday even furthered that when she came w/ me in the truck for a ride. and yet again i was up late dreaming. i kno most of u will view me as pathetic or weak. to keep falling for the same person. well thast y that song is listed up there. melissa i dn how u feel, but i still care. thast y that song was at the end of dane cook. im a wimp for not saying this directly to u, but... i have no excuse, im jsut afraid. my progress report sucked. yes i got 2 As and a B, but my physics was horrible, and i need to pass that class. i ahve alot more lil thoughts on my mind, but i cant focuse anymore. i just need an answer, a solution to all my stress. i dn... ~ray Current Mood: staind- right here (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, May 11th, 2005
9:37 pm	mid week well monday i went to docs, and they took more blood from me for more tests. if ure anyone who cares bout me, u already know wats going on. the whole night i was half dead from lack of blood, heh. i got home and basicly collapsed on my bed. and occasionaly got up to say hello online. for the most aprt i was on the 1-10 count haha. tuesday i droped off my truck at old colony for oil change, and look at my power steering. during the school day i got 3 fone calls and 2 voicemails. they needed to order a new power steering pump for my truck, and it would take an extra day. so i hitched a ride home w/ ally, and tried forging into my woods... that was boring so i rode my bike for a good 2 hours. didnt realy do much after. wed i got my truck back, and me and sherman tried to find A1 in west bridewater. couldnt find it, but i talked to ben, and i think i can if i went again. got home and played zelda, cause gina got the game stuck in my head. and ehre i am, quite bored. i dn wats goiung on for the weekend. i said i would go see footloose, but need someone to go w/, and not sure wat day. i thought there would be races on friday, but noone wants to race. so yea my weekends basicly open if anyone wnats to plan something. IM me online. as for my mood... im in a unique one. im not happy, im not sad, im not anything. kinda the mood where u could be shot and not flinch at all. just thinking about things i guess. **as a creepy side note... im seeing weird shadows in my room alot more often lately. i swear i saw my moms face last week, and i just saw a black figure move through my doorway in the reflection in the window. if i get weird cell fone calls again, ill freak.** ~ray Current Mood: ??? (Comment on this)
Saturday, May 7th, 2005
9:49 pm	near death well i just got home from drivin a bit, and was close to dying. ima just post wat im telling on aim, since its already written. DJSlakivich: i was on 495 drivin kinda fast DJSlakivich: some guy in an rsx flew past me in a slower lane and cut me off DJSlakivich: so i speed up to him and just gunned it DJSlakivich: was at about 95 or so and it started to rain harder DJSlakivich: so i started to abck off, but a turn, pothole, and a huge gust of wind later DJSlakivich: and my truck was sliding at a 45 degree angle form the center lane to the fast lane DJSlakivich: i cliped the dirt in the mid of the highway DJSlakivich: and the car went across all 3 lanes and finaly i got control again DJSlakivich: when it was done i was goin like 30 and in the breakdown lane last night was prom night... not for me though. i thought me and irina were gonna have dinner and movie (wont feel so bad about missin prom them). but she had karate so it was just a movie and it ended at 6. so i drove to walepole and chilled w/ dan. yes theres a prom in mansfield and i got as far away as possible. this whole week has been realy weird. i started tlaking to melissa again, and it made me feel so happy again, and it made my feelings strong again. but just as i am feeling happy again, i face the fact that im not goin to prom, and thats realy depressing. i dn y, but the time away from her didnt do much for my feelings. i still love her and miss her. im just afraid to say that (haha guess i just did). i guess time will tell as to wat happens in life (im refering to anything and everything here). i have to start to get ready for the sats again, so i can get a better score... 1540 isnt gonna cut it. school is winding down. i find out something on monday. and i have an oil change on tuesday. nothing special going on soon, so i dn when ill update again. ~ray Current Mood: ok (Comment on this)